Tue. May 26, 2009 | 3:00 PM
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All the single ladies, put your hands up!

Right now in America, there are quite a lot more "Single and Fierce" ladies out there than "Married and Fierce" ones, yet for some reason, the single ladies on today's show are feeling societal pressure to get someone to put a ring on it. Tyra talks to both the single ladies and the married ones, and we'll even hear from couples who are married, but don't want babies.

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I will be married 10 years this year and I still do not have any kids and DO NOT WANT ANY! My husband and I are just fine with this decision. I have so much freedom, I pack my bags and I am able to travel whenever and wherever I want. I love kids, but they are NOT FOR ME! I guess I am not the mommy type and I am so happy the way I am. Most of the ladies in my family with kids always seem so stressed out and they give the impression that they are trapped. I sometimes feel bad for them, because they do not have my freedom. And I found that a baby will not keep a marriage together. Most of my cousins that got married young, had kids young, are NOW DIVORCED YOUNG. My friend are fine the way we are and planning several wonderful vacations. We love our freedom!
Posted by Married-nokids-superhappy 06/11/09 12:25 AM
 
I am saddened by some of the responses some of the woman shared. I am 30 and have been married for 7 years I have 3 beautiful healthy children. It was the best gift I had ever received. I miscarried twins the first pregnancy and now am thankful for what I have today. Being single was what we all start off being, and having a family is a journey yet a blessing too. It's a job that requires a lot of love and time but the rewards are priceless!!! It's sad to hear that there idea of marriage would get in the way of them wanting to continue being selfish. I respect their choices but some of their views were very distorted. First the woman that was on the your right with the career and wanted nothing to do with marriage and children was very disrespectful towards the feelings of the opposite side. She stated her discuss of having to listen to other people bringing up their children and how adam was alone not the woman. She rolled her eyes and had such an immature view of what the married woman thought was important. Granted she had a right on how she felt but her attitude just made her extremely unattractive. To base her opinion on how a career was something of more value and how it is nothing like what a mother can handle pretty much, just shows how ignorant she sounds. It's really sad. thank you Tyra for your personality and heart. God bless you, Courtney
Posted by Courtney 06/10/09 2:33 PM
 
Wow this show was really interesting to see the views of various women and how marriage is viewed in America today. Shout out to the lady from Grambling! I went to GSU! keep up the good work Tyra.
Posted by Brittany 06/10/09 1:43 PM
 
Hi Tyra, I felt sad of how Nicey and Timeca's mom treated the sisters so differently because of THEIR OWN DECISION on marriage/having children. What IF her daughter that does not want to have children WASN'T ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN? How would her family treat her? They should be Happy for her success, happiness and that she is healthy. and Loves her family no matter what they choose to do or not do in their lives. I wish her the best, please don't let anyone burst you bubble. My own thought is our world is so different and difficult now than it was let's say 30 years ago. I somtimes feel it's selfish when people keep having baby's because they feel pressured into it!? What do todays children and young adults have to look forward to? We the Baby boomers will be lucky to have any retirement if we ever get to retire. Times are tuff for everyone , and probably will get tuffer. By ther way Tyra I love your show and you are just adorable. Mar
Posted by Mar 06/10/09 1:41 PM
 
i think both sides have very good points . when tyra asked if you felt like you were pressured to get married i was at home raising my own hand . i'm very young , married with a baby . i wasnt pressured by whats going on around me . but i felt pressured because my husband was 17 and i was 18 and his dad would make little comments like i'll help you take your son if you ever split up . i knew if that happened when he was still a minor he WOULD do it . so we got married so he was seen as a legal adult . it was a selfish move but i dont deny that i love him with all my heart . we've together for almost 4years , so it wasnt just a shotgun marriage . but i definetly regret doing it so soon . but i do agree with the married side when they say , when you find somebody you love & you know you want to be with them they become your life & for most people that means marriage .
Posted by Noel 06/10/09 9:39 AM
 
I think that on this show, many of the women on both sides of the marriage spectrum made many generalizations about the other group. They came into the show with pre conceived notions about lifestyles that are different from their own. It just comes down to the fact that all women are different. We can make our own decisions to do what we would like. Whether a woman decides to get married or stay single, have kids or not, NO ONE should disparage them for their own decision. This show was just a stage for stereotypes to be thrown out about women. I also think that the show was biased towards single women, and portrayed married women as weak, powerless, and brainwashed. I really think it is sad that these women couldn't just respect the decision that the other women made, even if it was different from theirs.
Posted by Kal 06/10/09 9:27 AM
 
I just wanted to comment that not all women who are mothers are sacrificing. I married at 21, had my first child at 24, and now am 28 with three beautiful babies. I had to quit my job as a general manager of a small retail chain due to financial reasons. Because of my opportunity to stay home, I have rediscovered my dream of becoming a writer. I have currently had my first article published and am working on my first novel, all thanks to the inspiration and support of my family. NOT dispite them.
Posted by Jessica 06/10/09 7:46 AM
 
I am 21 and I am a young mother of two and housewife. I was only 17 when I had my little girl and I was 18 when I got married. I do not regret having my little girl nor regret getting married to my husband. But whenever I had my little girl, there were ALOT of things that I had to give up so that I COULD be a good mother and wife. I believe that when you become a mother there are challanges you face and there are MANY things that you have to give up in order to be a good mother. I don't believe in going out EVERY single weekend and partying while someone else has my children. To get my point across .. I don't see anything wrong with those single women wanting to stay single. I always said that I would get married at 25 and have my first child at the age of 27. But that didn't happen. No I don't regret anything I have done but if I knew then what I know now .. I would have DEFINATELY waited a little longer for both.
Posted by Anonymous 06/10/09 6:33 AM
 
be single and live your best life. be married and be the best spouse and mom you can be. live life, love life.
Posted by Anonymous 06/10/09 2:50 AM
 
One of my LLF(Life Long Friends) were both at our homes watching this show and texting about it. She's 23 in hair school married with a 2year old and a newborn and I am 24 single and no kids. We talk about this all the time. I am the only one out of 30-45 grandchildren and one the last 3 out of my friends that is single and has no kids. Some of my loves try to talk me into having children one day BUT I DO NOT WANT KIDS EVER. I love being child-less. I am trying to focus on my future of becoming a FASHION DESIGNER(I LOVE FASHION SO MUCH)...I havent found my way yet and had some set backs like not having enough loans for FASHION school so right now life feels a little depressing right now and having love ones in my telling "just one baby one day please or your change your mind one day dont you wanna be like all your family and have a baby" and it kind of upsets me on the inside becuz I am trying to not be another statistic I am trying to become a great successful women (who NEVER wants kids) I have 10 nieces and nephews and a God son I can always return them back to their parents and yes sometimes I feel certian ppl look at me like theres something wrong with her Ive even been called gay before and it hurts a little it messes with a my confidence a little. I so agreed with Niecey and the other single women. Honestly Niecey's mother kind of offened me how dare a mother make her own daughter that she gave birth to feel bad about not wanting to be a mother. And you can have
Posted by Lilli"Pebbles"Spears 06/04/09 8:18 AM
 
Hi Tyra, My name is Elisa. I'm currently married and have a two-year-old baby boy. My son and marriage were not quite planned, however if I could go back in time, I would not exchange my child for anything in the world. I love my husband; and I'm happily married, although sometimes my husband and I have our little disagreements. Nonetheless, sometimes, I feel that I'm missing out a lot because I had to put my career aside in order to be able to keep my family together. I know that I am capable to do what I put my mind on. I don't feel envy when I see single women who are prosper, but I do feel proud of them, because even though I am married, I don't think that a woman has to be married in order to be accepted in society.
Posted by Elisa Lugo 06/03/09 11:33 PM
 
I really related to the married couple that did not want children. They were so adorable and remind me of my husband and I. We married young but are both very adamant that we do not want children. I am so lucky to have found a man that shares this lack of desire with me. What I related to most was what the woman said about having a maternal instinct toward animals. I'm a veterinary technician and will gladly bottle feed a litter of kittens for 4 weeks. Put a child in front of me however and I cringe. I find it extremely interesting that women like her and I are not absent of maternal instinct, we just direct it toward another species in need.
Posted by Melissa H 06/03/09 11:08 PM
 
DO U! If u're traditional and want to be married with children, so be it. If you want to be Miss Independent and Miss Career-Oriented then that's ur preference. There's no right or wrong way to view this issue. To each its own. I would prefer women that aren't family-oriented to focus on their careers rather than have kids and not bond with them and mistreat them. For the ones who want kids, just wait on the right man and prepare for ur soon-2-be family. Its hard doing it alone but I'm not saying it can't be done. Since it takes two to make them its easier when the two have input on raising them.
Posted by blackgirl404 06/03/09 10:51 PM
 
I was so bothered by this show why is it there is always one side more dominant than the other. The one hippy looking white lady on the end of the " I don't need a husband" she was so angry it was rediculous! And one thing I hate is when someone tries to bring up the gay "crowd or audience" just to get their kuddos and the hippy looking white lady did just that. Lets stick to the topic and stop bringing gays into the subject just to look good on t.v ...Also tyra I wish you would screen your panel better so that the arguements aren't one sided (the I don't need a husband panel dominated the arguement and poor white girl on the pink on the opposite side was left to defend her side ( I would have helped her out if I could :) ).
Posted by Erica Richards 06/03/09 10:48 PM
 
Wow... I'm watching this show at an interesting time in my life. I am 23 and rapidly achieving in my career as a Graphic Designer. At a very young age (age 7) I decided that I wanted to adopt children like Josephine Baker did. Lol. I never realised that this feeling would evolve into this strong desire to NEVER bare children. For this, I am often laughed at as if I'm joking or I'm told "you just haven't found the right GUY", lol. I've also heard that I am "selfish"... yet this comes from people who say "I want to see what my kids will LOOK like!". In the next few years I want to live abroad, accelerate my career so that I can begin either a mentoring program or community center, and if I find a husband a long the way, that's fine. But finding someone who doesn't care about a woman who won't have children is a challenge. As women, we've been strongly socialised to desire and expect things that may not be realistic to each of us. Society causes many anxieties that we could be happy without. I have to agree with one of the comments about how extreme both panels of women are. Your choices are YOURS and everyone else doesn't have to conform. It'd be a BORING world if we all thought and operated the same.
Posted by theComplex 06/03/09 10:35 PM



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