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We all have a choice.

Unless you've been under a rock, you've heard all the praise surrounding the movie Slumdog Millionaire. One of the most fascinating aspects of the film is actually the soundtrack and the story of its composer, A. R. Rahman. He won two Oscars for his work on the score and when accepting his second award, his words were short and to the point: "All my life I had a choice of hate and love. I chose love and I'm here." Powerful words to be sure, but what do they mean?

For me, it's quite simple. Everyday we have the opportunity to be positive or negative influences in our universe. Each day we are confronted with the chance to build up and support or knock down and destroy. Which course do you take?

When your BFF comes to you with an idea she is extra excited about. Do you quickly point out all flaws and why it will never work, or do you tell her it's awesome and ask how you can help her make it happen? Love or Hate? A co-worker announces that she's getting married and enthusiastically shows her ring. Do you let them know you're happy for them, or do whisper to colleagues that the ring probably is fake? Love or Hate? You are super close with your sister and she gets an amazing job offer across the country. Do you give her a major guilt trip trying to get her to stay (after all, you would never choose a job over her), or do you send her off with your best wishes and a big party? Love or Hate?

We are constantly given these opportunities to choose and the path you choose has an impact not only on you, but those you interact with. Just think about how differently we receive someone that flashes a smile instead of a scowl. Now think of living your life as that smile.

But make no mistake; this is NOT the 80's mantra "don't worry, be happy." Acting with love doesn't mean that you view the world through rose colored Chloe's and act as if our troubles and conflicts don't exist. That would be silly. Choosing love allows us to act in affirmation. To support and love, but to also protest and demonstrate. To lift someone up, but to also let someone know what he said wasn't cool. When I express outrage at the BART police, question Washington politicians or criticize Wall Street bankers, it is not because I hate those institutions. My motivation comes from a love of justice and respect for the human community.

So what does it mean to walk in love? It means support your friend, congratulate your co-worker and be happy for your sister. It means, love and respect yourself while respecting others around you and the space they occupy. It means thinking about how to make things better while understanding that someone else's success doesn't insure your failure. It also means confronting injustice, standing up for what's right and realizing that hate only destroys the hater.

Choosing this path doesn't make you weak. Truly, only those of the strongest character can choose love every time. I am not there yet (especially when I'm behind the wheel, it's very hard to find love there!) and just like you, each day I have the opportunity to do better. Everyday I have the choice between love and hate. Today, I choose Love.

Al Butler is the host of the popular radio show "Al B! In the Afternoon..." where he is known for his unique perspectives, sharp humor and strong opinions. Discouraged by their indifference, Albert calls on the twenty-something crowd to step out, step up and get moving. He'll challenge you to not just call for change, but to actually be the difference you wish to see in your society and the global community. This is his call to action.



 
i really thing that carl did killed that girl u can see it in his eyes.he looks like an abusive man. i feel sorry for becky's mother if there is anything worst is the lost of a son or daughter. carl killed himself because he couldn't handle the guilt.
 
Thats a really sad situation... both families arent perfect though. I mean, harrassing the guys family and friends ruins there lives also but its also a good thing that the mother is so persistent on finding out what happened. I dont think anybody can be blamed yet because both sides have good points... however, we all know that he WAS abusive... theres no way all these woman are lying... OPEN YOUR EYES!
 
Watching this episode made me mad.Looking at this Im not sure what to believe but I can see that the woman that lost her daughter have no respect. Because if I had a child that was lose ill try my hardest to find him/her but why would you have something like that thrown in the face of his children. They have nothing to do with it and they are to young to be seeing things like that. The sister had so much faith in her brother but then again you never know what goes on in private. As for the ex-wife she lived with this man and she should know his intention and her story made more since than everybody else. I think if her really did kill his wife before he killed himself he would have said something because after that he's dead so its not like they cant do anything about it. Some may say he did it because of guilt, but that is not the only reason people kill themself. Think about it if you had to go through what went through everyday and not only you but you kids having to be depressed and stressed out because of all this harrassment how would you feel. I just feel that her mother is doing this because of his race because if he was not black she would have made it as extreme as she's doing. And there's always to sides to a story.......
 
I have been in a relationship with a guy whom was abusive toward other women but not me. He even took the time to take up for one of my friends that was being abused by her husband. I was with this man for 4yrs and had no idea. His mother came to my house to tell me that he was abusive. One of his ex girlfriends even game to my job and told me things that he did to her. His sister would also mention things that he did. When I was told all of this I was shocked because I wouldn't have ever thought. I don't know if he did it or not but for the sister and ex wife you guys need to open your eyes and understand that there are things that goes on behind close doors that people don't tell.
 
The ex wife is lying, what he just woke up one day and threw her down the stairs but they never got physical before that? That guy killed himself because the guilt ate away at him, he didn't confess because he didn't want his family to be crushed by the truth. Why would the other woman lie if she hadn't know anything about the missing girlfriend?
 
Sorry Carl's sister, but I see you are in denial also. In Carl's suicide message he say's " I don't know how to convince people I didn't do it. " meaning the cops are on my tail and jail is coming fast.
 
If this guy was beating her so bad,why was the police never called.The mother said she had broken ribs and a broken nose,but she never took her daughter to the hospital.So how can she say what the injuries were.
 
I am going to print this out and post it at work.. Kudos on a great article
 
I totally agree with the previous post...Carl's sister is in such denial. She was making me so mad just sitting here watching her speak. I mean really...the guilt was most def getting to him. I feel for his ex-wifes kids but I don't agree with the idea that the girls mother should give up on trying to prove that Carl is the killer. Just like Carl's sister said "there is no perfect murder" something will break the case. KEEP LOOKING AND HAVE FAITH. NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
 
OMG~ God bless this woman who has lost her daughter, more monthers should be like her. I have never seen anyone in such denial as the sister of the abuser. All these females cannot be lying.There is a reason he killed himself, not because the mother harrassed him, but because he felt the guilt.......My heart goes out both the families effected by him killing this girl. "Women wake up" !



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