Should you keep it a secret or spill your guts?
The guilt is weighing on you like a ton of bricks. You didn't mean for it to happen, but somehow it did. You cheated on your man. Now you've got to decide -- should you keep it a secret or spill your guts? It may be tempting not to tell about your tantalizing rendezvous, but experts say there's major danger in staying mum. Without communication, there can be no reparation. And do you really want to keep the lie of your life a secret from the love of your life?
Even if you don't tell your guy, remember that he may find out anyway. Wouldn't you rather be brave and tell him the bad news yourself instead of getting busted for cheating and lying? Confessing is no easy task, so we've got tips on the best ways to spill your guts.
1. Have a chat with yourself about what your sneaky smooching really means. It's usually a signal that you're unhappy with an aspect of your current relationship. Maybe the between-the-sheets action is more mind-numbing than toe-curling. Or maybe you're getting the cold shoulder when it comes to emotional support, so you're curling up in the arms of someone new.
But there's no way your guy you can fix that hole in your heart if he doesn't know it's there, so this is where the "big talk" comes in.
2. Find a quiet, private place to confess your infidelity. Remember, honesty really is the best policy. This doesn't mean you should give your dude all the dirty details, even if he begs for them. The important thing is to come clean with basic facts. It's not the time for the blame game.
3. Be prepared for all the heavy, hurtful consequences. Give your guy a chance to get out his anger (and trust us, he's gonna be mad!) and the space he needs to deal.
4. Decide together if it's worth it to keep working on your relationship. If both of you aren't still in it to win it, there's no use playing the game.
5. If you both decide to stick together, you're gonna need some help. Make an appointment with a professional counselor or therapist, check out some self-help books and be patient. Deep wounds may leave scars, but with the right care and attention, it's possible for them to heal.
You tell us: If you cheat, should you confess? If someone cheated on you, would you want to know?
