sexinschools2.jpgIt's no secret: Kids are having sex younger and younger, and they're not just doing it in the backseat of dad's car. They're doing it in school. In fact, more and more teens are going behind the school stage, under the bleachers and into abandoned classrooms to do more than hold hands. Dr. Gary offers these tips to better understanding (and handling) teen sexuality.


1. Acknowledge your adolescent or teenage child is becoming a sexual being -- just like you did.


2. Realize children are becoming sexualized earlier and earlier. With the advent of the Internet, we are raising the first generation of children who are just one mouse click away from x-rated websites and other adult material. Combine that with a media that saturates kids with lots of sex and sexual imagery, and you've got a recipe for kids who are sexualized by the time they're 9 or 10 years old.


3. Raging hormones are VERY hard to combat. Give your children an outlet to burn off the overwhelming feelings stirring inside of them. Sign them up for activities like dance class or sports to help them redirect their energy.


4. Have open, honest and nonjudgmental conversations with your child about sex. Sometimes parents have selective memories about their own "growing up" experiences and sexual experimentation. So let children know that you've had the same feelings they're feeling, and it's okay.


5. And if your child does have sex? Hold them closer to you. Talk to them with forgiveness and without judgment.

You tell us: What's the best way to talk to kids about sex?



NEXT: Would You Date a Guy Who Lives at Home?


 
hi tyra, i recently saw your show about teenagers having sex in school and a number of things about it made me a little upset. for one when u said u take back about what said about gio i felt u were being too judgmental about his whole situation. i felt like u were being too black and white about it. i not saying it's right but i feel like u were making them (the other teenagers as well) feel bad for making a mistake. gio took responsibility for what he did and i feel like u saying he had to apologize on top of it was asking a bit too much. he did what he did and it can't be taken back. he did say in hindsight that he shouldn't of done it and i think that's enough. you and some of the other parents make it seem like u never made a mistake (big or little) in your life. overall, i felt like anything that was said was coming from a one-sided point of view and i didn't appreciate it.
 
HI! TYRA I LOVE UR SHOW I RECORD IT ON MY DVR EVERY DAY WHEN IM N SKOOL IM ALMOST 16 AND I THINK HAVING SEX! BE4 UR IN LOVE READY R MARRIED IS SOOOO DUMB KISSIN AND STUFFS OK BUT DONT BE SLUTTY WITH IT DUCEZ
 
Hey tyra i wld lyk 2 tell u i really love ur show. U wear really cool cloths. I am a 16 year old from South Africa i am im grade 11 standard 9 i will be in matric next year and i dont have a matric dance dress. Would u plz get me a drss .
 
hi tyra I'm thirteen and I think that people shouldn't have sex unless they are mature enough to face the consequences. Teenagers are disrespecting the schools and their selfs. Sex is a topic that is everywhere and its very diseving. Teens are thinking that sex is normal and at this age its perfectly fine to "do it." i like to think that I'm mature but in reality doesnt everyone my age think that. my opinion is that kids my age should just wait until theyre mature enough and focus on their education more than their future sex life.
 
i just turned 18 n a month from now my daugter will turn one!!! i dont reget havin her i lover to death!!! i just feel or better yet i was rushed to grow up! n i just want to let these gurls know it aint easy! especily if u want a nice good life for ur baby! u got to think better make more responsbile choices! i know gurls dat got pregant on purpose,they messed up thier nice figure,filled thier bodies wit srtech marks,got all fat,teared thier u know wat down there for wat so dat thier mom can raise thier babies!!! teenage moms have skool to finish o n parties they need to go to friends to keep up wit!!! these gurls have babies On purpose den realized wat they got thier self into n decide to bail but in my point of view u wanted a baby so deal wit all da responsbiltes babys bring!it really makes me mad dat all these teens bringing all des babies to da world suffer!! i know im one too but i have lived up to my resbonsiblites!! i finsed skool early online so i can stay home wit mydaugter for a while den i got a job me n my boifriend havent really asked much from our parnets he had 2jobs at one point we pay for all da things my babygurl needs help out wit bills n everthing!! i just to let these yong gurls it a huge responsiblty n some gurls do reget it!! they just cant handle the responsibty DONT RUSH IN TO THINGS
 
Hello I am 9 yrs old and i tryed to sex in shcool in the closet with mark but i got scared when i saw his privit part so i told him no and think any girl shud just say no if they are scared ps. he is my bf so it is ok
 
hello. As i was watching your showw about ten sex in school[we actually had a discussion about this in college], im not saying that i dont condone it because i was also a permiscuous teenager. Now being 21 years old and growing out of it, i was suprised to see somthings. One thing i was concerned about was yeah, its alright to have sex with a condom on but what about the dieases? There are many diseases that you can get even with a condom on that are incureable including hepetitis, herpes, and other things. I think that was the most important thing that should have been mentioned that people forget to mention amongst other STDs and it is just as serious as getting HIV. Also the risk of females having serious problems down the line including abnormal paps and menstrual cycles slimming the chances to reproduce. Maybe if these things are identified, some teenagers can have a better outlook on how serious teenage sex is and how much abstinence should be considered. just some food for thought. much luv, Chariz *muah*
 
Hey tyra, Im 19 yrs old and still a Virgin..honestly i feel like its ok to have sex if ur in love and are absolutely positive u met the right person...MY parents were the type to treat me with ALOt of love.. maybe too much babying me all the time.. but yea i feel like my parents doing so..made me feel like i didnt need any1 else to love me...i dont kno..it jus never gave me the desire to rush anything/ so i guess thats a good thing... ive never been attached to any guy but for some reason they all get attached to me ... its wierd. If a guy can wait at least 5 months for u .. i'd say thats a pretty good minimum
 
tyra, i just turned 13 in july and i do think its wrong to have sex before your married. im not saying that people who had sex before they were married are bad but they made a bad choice. so many young girls are having sex they are saying i didnt know what to do i think you should just say no flat out. i think you should wait because thats when you know you actually love them because you commited to them(:
 
hey tyra im a 17 year old girl that had a baby at the age of 15 and now im really understanding the big responsibility of being a mother but my own mother is constanly putting me down im still in school working hard and making good grades i feel like im under so much stress other people besides my mother tell me how good im doing but i need a little advice on what to do tyra PLEASE HELP ME !!
 
sex is natural but for married persons baby boy/girl.
 
hey tyra, i'm 14 and i recently told my parents about me losing my virginity a few months ago. they were really disappointed that the guy i lost it to was "just a friend" but i'm really happy that that's all he was. we dont really talk anymore because we dont want people to know what happened. but anyways about a week ago i had sex with two other people and i'm not sure if they used protection. they say they did but i dont know if they were telling the truth. since then i have felt very different, like i'm always tired, never hungry and kinda emotional. my mom keeps asking me if i'm pregnant but i'm afraid to find out because she said she will make me get an abortion and i'm 100 percent against it. i havent told her or my boyfriend about the other two people yet and i am really confused and scared. i really need someone to talk to and get some helpful advice. PS. me and my boyfriend have been together for almost a year now and he is 16. he wanted me to wait to have sex so we havent done anything yet. he knows i cheated on him once, but the second and third times he doesnt know about. i dont know what to do. i really like him and he tells me that he has a feeling that i'm not being faithful to him. please help.
 
Hi Tyra, Firstly, let me say that I love watching your show. I am from the caribbean and sex here is like bathing, youths seem to do it every day as a rule, but I don't know what the rush is. Personally, sex spoils a relationship, especially a young one. You forget eachother because you find it hard to look the person in the eye after the relationship is over. You lose respect for eachother because you lost the mystery in the relationship. If a guy cannot wait on you or a girl if the case may be they do not love you. I am only 19 but I know that 12, 13, 14, 15, 16.... and so on are way to young to start having sex. You are not emotionally ready in any way for the heart break that comes after the end of the relationship. Patience, everything will come to you in time. I promise if you wait till your married you will enjoy it more. And you won't have that guilty feeling after. And for Jade, sweetie stay in school you have much more to learn about life and so many other things. Enjoy life, a baby is too much to study right now, way too much responsibility. not that I have any of my own but I've seen teenage mothers struggle to take care of their children. Love lot's, Jenyl
 
hey tyra, i am 14 years old. I was 12 years old when i lost my virginity. It was with my boyfriend.He is 16 now,but he was 15 then. It was my choice to have the sex,but i do regret it at times. I Still Haven't told my parents and i don't know if i will ever get the courage to. I am still with my boyfriend, but my parents don't know that cause i am scared they would make me leave him.i just need some one to talk to and to get some answers.
 
Dear tyra, my mother did the big mistake of letting my boyfriend and i go to home with out anyone else being in the house . I told him that i had things to do and i noticed that he was rushing me to finish .and when i finished something almost happend and i told him i wasnt ready to let go of my virginity he said ok and through the whole time we were their together he kept trying to make me have sex with him...next time this happens what should i do?



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