sexinschools2.jpgIt's no secret: Kids are having sex younger and younger, and they're not just doing it in the backseat of dad's car. They're doing it in school. In fact, more and more teens are going behind the school stage, under the bleachers and into abandoned classrooms to do more than hold hands. Dr. Gary offers these tips to better understanding (and handling) teen sexuality.


1. Acknowledge your adolescent or teenage child is becoming a sexual being -- just like you did.


2. Realize children are becoming sexualized earlier and earlier. With the advent of the Internet, we are raising the first generation of children who are just one mouse click away from x-rated websites and other adult material. Combine that with a media that saturates kids with lots of sex and sexual imagery, and you've got a recipe for kids who are sexualized by the time they're 9 or 10 years old.


3. Raging hormones are VERY hard to combat. Give your children an outlet to burn off the overwhelming feelings stirring inside of them. Sign them up for activities like dance class or sports to help them redirect their energy.


4. Have open, honest and nonjudgmental conversations with your child about sex. Sometimes parents have selective memories about their own "growing up" experiences and sexual experimentation. So let children know that you've had the same feelings they're feeling, and it's okay.


5. And if your child does have sex? Hold them closer to you. Talk to them with forgiveness and without judgment.

You tell us: What's the best way to talk to kids about sex?



NEXT: Would You Date a Guy Who Lives at Home?


 
You are ready to have sex after your first menstruation (like 10-15). If we weren't supposed to have sex at such a young age we wouldn't be fertile and have a strong sexdrive. Why would "god" make it possible for us to become pregnant in our teens if it was a sin to have sex at 14? Duh. And the emotional part is just something made up by society. For me, who grew up in a society were virginity is very old fashioned, this is just ridiculous and scary. The way you are pressuring these girls to stay virgins make them view themselves as filthy. Sex is something natural and fun that you should want for your kids, not deny them. If you provide yourself with condoms and birthcontrol pills there is no way you will have to "deal with the consequences too young". It's not difficult to have safe sex, it's not dangerous and you don't even have to be that mature. You are making SUCH a big deal out of this. Everyone should do what feels right to them, even if it sounds wierd to you Tyra.
 
Hi Tyra, I'm 14 and me and my boyfriend have been dating for a few months now and I think we took things WAY too fast. We started having sex after a few months of dating and we really love each other. A lot of my friends have turned on me because of him but I cannot let him go. I recently found out I am pregnant. His ex-gf is also preg with his baby but i had no clue until after it happened. I don't know how to tell him or any of my friends or family. I just need help on what to do about all this chaos. help??
 
Im 14 (15 in october) & the farthest i've gon was kiss my boyfrend rob. I feel that girls my age are just startin hi skool & at any tyme will feel pressured in2 doin things that we may not b comfortable wit. Also we feel that we're yung & that we shuld get evrything outa the way b4 we get married. My frends think its spontaneous & sumtymes really fun 2 rebel against all ur beliefs. Im still a virgin & dont do drugs or drink, but i do do things that 14yr old girls didnt do bak in tha day.
 
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Hello, we are 17 and 15. Today is July 9th and we just watched your show on teenage girls and their sexual activities. Something we noticed is that you were targeting girls as a specific, and we don't agree. Girls are not the only ones having sex at a young age, not the only ones having sex in inappropriate places. We didn't appreciate you targeting just us. Yes a lot of girl have sex to early but not everyone is doing it for attention and bragging about it. A lot of girls keep to themselves. Most girl that i at least talk to do because they feel they are in love. Even though they may not be a lot of girls are smart enough to use protection. We think you should do a show on teenage boys too, because more often then not protection isn't used because they DON'T WANT PROTECTION. A STD's are passed on because guys don't tell their partners because they want sex that bad. Girls are not completely at fault here.
 
I had sex at school 1 in a theater arts closet, and my best friend has had oral sex on the stairs and in the class room when the teacher stepped out to talk to a parent on the phone,she's had sex under the stairs,in the bad room while the band was at practice(she's not even in band)in the science lab,on the stage and in the rest room during lunch. She's very proud of what she does and isnt afraid to say she does it with multiple guys on the same days WITH OUT protectin.
 
I am 13 fixing to be 14 the farthest i have ever gone with a guy is with my ex ex boyfreind kevin we kissed for like 2 secounds at the buses at school. my current bf has had sex and has ben asking me to latley and i want to so bad i just dont have birthcontrol and i am scared the condom will break!! my parents are bible worshippers and tell to wait till marrige but i dont thinki can make it that long please help email mat babycakes410@gmail.com
 
heyy tyraa:) i Lovee your showw. i want to start off by tellinqq my storyy to you and see if you kan help me. im 14 yrs old and im curretly in a relationshipp. me and my bf have been qoinq out for alomost 9 months and he is always tellinq me thinqs like i wanna make you mine and basicly just tellinq me that he wants to have sexx. sumtimes i just qo alonq with it and tell him i want to do it but in really i dontt. hes kome to my house about 2 timess and laid me down on my bedd and we've donee a lot of thinqs (with ut clothes on) but never actually donee anythinqq REAL. he has told me hes not a virgin but i dont really beleive himm. he says that he wants to be my first.i am REALLY in Lovee with him. all my friends say that i probably WILL loose my virginity with him but deep down inside i kinda dont want too. hes kind of a b.i.t.c.h. and he thinks im cheatinq on him with a quyy that doessnt live where i live but that i've known for a couplee of months.they both are in gangs and me and my bf live in sand diego and the other quy knows ALL my family and lives in LA. hes a really qood friend and he tells me to leave my bf kuz he dont deserve me but im really confusedd. withh that quy i HAVE gonee kinda farr not anythinqq big but he has triedd to get all up on me and sumtimess i let him b/c he is the NICESSTTT quyy EVERR! i Lovee himm a lott (as a loverr:)and he does too but all he wants is me
 
hi i am a 14 year old girl from florida! i feel that yes kids are having sex younger and younger but not every kid is doing it! im not and im proud of it. please dont go around saying all kids do it because me and all of my friends but 1 are still virgins its not just me or a few kids. this generation isnt a bad generation its a good one with a few bad people thrown in the mix!
 
hey tyra im 16 and i lost my virginity when i was 13. way to young. i stil havent told my mom bout it because im scared of what she would say. my mom kinda was distenced from me and i like this boy and he kept tellin me that he loved me and that he would love me more if i had sex with him. i thought i loved him at the time but i no it was a huge mistake. when i would go to his house i didnt ever want to do anything but he would grab my arms and pull me towards him i would tell him nobut he wouldnt stop and i would finally give. but im dumb and i kept goin back to him. i finally gave up on him i thought he would resect me more now that we are a little bit older but he still doesnt the last time i went there he did the same stuff. one time he grabed my hair and pulled my head back and smacked me not hard but he still did it and i no it would get worse if i would stay with him. but i regret it every day!! the good thing is most girls would have sex with other guys to but he has been the only one. and i dont trust guys because od him.
 
Hi Tyra. I am Finish girl, and I watch your show, if I can. This sex thing isn't so worring in finland, becos we don't have sex in school or anything like that, not whear I live. I think that best thing that adulst can do, is talk. I hate if someone says to me: "Do not do that or that." Give children kondoms and do not lock them to their rooms. My parent's tried to do that, and next day I didn't talk to them. Why you ask, becos it hurts my feelings. This is my body and they can't tell me when I am ready. It's my own choice. My advice to amerikan parents is: tell your children that you trust them. Allmost every time, we want to be worth of that trust and it's making us feel better.
 
Its me piyal.do sex in class9.



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